Pillar #2: People are Fake, Pro-Wrestling is Real

The Pillars series is a group of posts intended to sum up myself and a lot of my biggest interests and what I'll be writing about in the future. This time I'm taking a look at my love of pro-wrestling. My previous post was a look at many of the things that make me feel like a total weirdo.

A Body Slam by Any Other Name

A man in a black helmet looks at a distressed young man and tells him that he is in fact the young man's father.

A wedding goes horribly wrong, dozens are killed.

A man finds out that he was in fact dead the whole time.

Now, what if I said all of that wasn't real, what would you say?

You'd probably tell me to fuck off.

Fair enough, but that's what it's like to be a professional wrestling fan.

I'm not saying we're oppressed (if anything we should probably be oppressed more) but I want to point out the interesting cultural double-standard at play here. When media isn't real such as The Pitt (excellent show by the way), we don't ever hear people say (it's unlikely anyhow) oh well that show doesn't matter because it's not real. You know it's not real, right? Why are you so invested in it then? If something isn't real it's not worth your time, it's childish.

There's a million different responses wrestling fans have to this at this point and many are just as trite as the complain/criticism. A mix of "so what?" to "fuck you" to "really? that old thing?" and probably many more. But the best response I've found is to compare it to any other media. Anything you watch on TV is liable to be fake, it's all orchestrated by actors, directors, camera people and so forth.

If I had to speculate on why it doesn't matter in that case to many people it's because those shows (allegedly) aren't trying to lie to you and tell you that they're not fake. And that's a nice thought, but unfortunately it's also total bullshit.

That's because every bit of fictional media is trying to convince you on some level that it's real. TV shows, books, movies, video games, plays, anything that is fictional wants you to engage with it in some real capacity. Through your thoughts, feelings, critical reflections, arguments you'll have with friends after the movie has run credits, to the money you spend on it and all of the love or hate you'll express.

And in a very "real" sense, these shows are completely real. The people who are acting in them are real, the people behind the cameras are real, the only thing that isn't real is the people they're portraying and the situations they're involved in.

Oh, I guess that's pretty much wrestling too, huh?

Look, it's not the biggest problem in the world now, to say the least, but this dismissal of things that "aren't real" often comes off to me as a way to make people feel bad for their hobbies or interests. And that's just something I'll never be able to vibe with. Unless the hobby is actively causing harm to society in some real and tangible way, I don't think shaming people about what they're interested in, or even just dismissing it, is especially called for.

Some people like soap operas (Days of Our Lives is on season 60!), some folks like the Marvel movies still, for some reason. And others watch sports religiously, and I gotta tell you even some of that is arguably fake or pre-determined.

That doesn't mean it's all fake of course, it just means when people talk about how "real" other sports are compared to pro-wrestling, I tend to roll my eyes. "Real" sports can be faked just like pro-wrestling can be and sometimes people can make a lot of money by making those odds ever in their favor. Again, I'm not saying that means the sports are inconsequential (if I thought that why would I watch pro-wrestling?) but the point is, nothing is safe from being "fake" in some way.

And, from my autistic selves perspective, people are way more fake, on average, than the usual pro-wrestling match. People hide behind masks, social conventions, manners, mannerisms, body language, facial language, niceties, and whatever else they can find so they don't have to engage in an authentic way. And, to be clear, I'm not above any of that, I'm just more aware of it than some people are because my brain is wired differently and so I notice it more easily than others do.

Consider the classic situation: Your partner asks you if the dress makes their butt look big. This is already a confusing situation to me. Some people think having a big butt is nice and desirable, other people think it makes you look fat or would just rather look skinny because of modern day fucked up beauty standards.

But the classic response is: No, you look great. Instead of "yes, but there's nothing wrong with that". And obviously this is an outdated example, I'd like to think we've come far enough in society that partners don't need to lie to each other about their looks but maybe that's me being too optimistic about society.

Also, just to cover my own ass for a second, no I don't think pro-wrestling is completely comparable to those three iconic scenes I mentioned above. Pro-wrestling can have beautiful storytelling, but I'm not trying to make a 1:1: comparison here, just to illustrate a point about pro-wrestling.

The Very Real Price of Being Fake

But okay, let's say you're not convinced. All shows may be fake to some extent, sure, but these guys and gals (and non-binary pals!) aren't really enduring that much here, right? The rings are padded, the moves are performative, a lot of the finishers wouldn't even hurt if you did them on your friends, etc.

If that's your position, then let me tell you a few stories.

Content Warning: I'm going to be including some deeply tragic stories from pro-wrestling. If that's not your thing, skip ahead.

1. In 1999, due to a lack of safety precautions, the late great Owen Hart died during the 1999 Over the Edge pay-per-view put on by the then WWF when he fell 90 feet to his death and hit one of the top ropes.
2. On November 13th, 2005 WWE wrestling Eddie Guerrero was found by his nephew in a hotel room unresponsive. He died as a result of "acute heart failure", likely due to his history of addiction, which was in part because of the pain he suffered from wrestling as well as his own inner demons.
3. In June of 2007 the wrestler Chris Benoit murdered both his wife, their 7-year old son, and then hung himself in a double-murder and suicide. Many explanations have been given for this horrific event. The most prominent are issues of CTE, steroid abuse, and alcohol abuse. This horrible event caused such a stir that an investigation into steroid abuse within the WWE.

I'm not saying any of that because I don't want people to watch wrestling, quite the opposite in fact. I want people to appreciate that the risks people take in "fake" moves can prove very real. So many wrestlers have had to get surgeries of many kinds so they can keep providing entertainment to families, children, adults of all ages, and they often don't get great medical benefits, for what it's worth.

No, in fact, wrestlers are often classified legally as "independent contractors" which means they don't fit the bill as formalized employees. That means there are many benefits (such as medical ones) that wrestlers don't get and won't ever get, even if they're Stone Cold Steve Austin. That said, if they're making as much money as Stone Cold did, it's likely they can afford such procedures.

But, the catch is, most wrestlers aren't at that level, nowhere even close. Most wrestlers make on average somewhere in the tens of thousands, or at best for many, upper echelon of that range. And you might be saying, "Well shit, Dory, I wish I got paid that amount of money for what amounts to rolling around in spandex, doing a few poses, and flipping around a couple times!"

And sure, who wouldn't? But also, consider this: Injury. Once you get injured it's a lot of money to do PT, your entire source of income is gone, you need time to rest and recover and your bills don't stop just because you've stopped working. Former WWE wrestler Maven said recently:

The key to that is remaining injury free. The moment you get injured, the moment you go back to your downside guarantee, you don't have the possibility of earning this much.

And even if you do remain injury free, for years even, the amount of travel, wear and tear on your body (that padding isn't nearly as helpful as you think), the wardrobe, the painkillers, the gym memberships, the hotel costs, etc. All of it adds up and especially when you're an indie wrestler or even in WWE developmental who, allegedly, earn as little as 30k a year, and for reference I make only 10k less than that and I'm nowhere near getting into a squared circle.

My point in all of this isn't to make you pity pro-wrestlers. After all, they're all adults who know what they're getting into when they start (unless we want to get into Mexico and Japan and how early you can train to become a wrestler in those countries, but let's stick to America for now) and they pay the price. But the point is that the price is really high and the payout doesn't always match that, to the extent that becoming a wrestler is a very risky proposition in some circumstances.

You have to be in extremely good health, be able to work hard at self-improvement at almost all times. Be OK with almost never seeing friends or family besides holidays (and even then sometimes not) and having your social life generally suffer because of your work. Pro-wrestlers famously don't take many days off, it's one of the few things in life that goes year-round. Though I will say that in more recent years pro-wrestling (at least in the big companies like WWE and AEW) are doing tapings before the week of Christmas so wrestlers can spend time with their families and ditto for other holidays such as Thanksgiving.

But regardless of the small steps forward that have been made, the risks are still very real and the costs can still be quite high. And they're doing this to entertain us in much the same way gymnasts and soap operas are trying to do so. I don't say this as an insult but affectionately professional wrestling is just a gigantic on-going soap opera with gymnastics and weight lifting involved, that's it really.

I know there are many people who appreciate a good bit of drama and there are also likely many people who appreciate gymnastics. Look at how popular the Olympics still are or how many sports clips go viral on the internet. Pro-wrestling takes all of these facets and puts it all together.

The "So What?" Factor

One thing that you get taught when you're trying to write persuasive papers is that you've gotta have some kind of big takeaway. The "So what?" of it all.

Okay, so this is my point: Pro-wrestling is just as real as most forms of media and likely more risky with even less medical benefits than your typical actor might get because of a bullshit independent contractor categorization, but so what? Why should you care that any of this is the case, assuming you now see my point.

Let me answer that question with a story:

It's January 7th, 2002. 9/11 isn't that long ago, America is in shambles and the government has already started cracking down on Arab-Americans and countries that have nothing to do with the attack. I'm a 10 year old boy at this point, sitting in my mother and step-father's room. He's watching WWE and I'm following along because I want to connect with him in some kind of meaningful way.

On the screen there's a scrawny man with colorful hair, tattoos, early 2000s alternative fashion and a white tank top facing off against another man in a bandana, a Texas man, an "American badass" who is one of the most famous wrestlers in history: The Undertaker.

The Undertaker massively overpowers the other man, Jeff Hardy. Jeff doesn't have a prayer for a lot of the match, but he has an advantage: He's facing The Undertaker in a ladder match. The point of this match is that you can use ladders as weapons and you must get the title by climbing the ladder. Undertaker had never been in a ladder match before being a bigger guy and Hardy had already been in many by this point. He had many advantages due to his speed, but now he has the added advantage of knowing how to use ladders in the context of a match.

Throughout this nearly 20 minute match (wrestling matches can either be really long or really short, depending on context), Jeff does his best to outmaneuver Undertaker. He's the ultimate babyface (good guy) and underdog, he's got the entire crowd behind him at several points, as well as commentator Jim Ross who screams at one point, "CLIMB THAT LADDER, KID! MAKE YOURSELF FAMOUS!" which is something I can still hear in my head when I see on the screen.

No one thinks Jeff is going to win.

And he doesn't.

But as I sit there, as a 10 year old boy, I see how hard Jeff struggles against impossible odds. He's in an industry that, at this point, almost never offers guys like him (lanky, less muscular) a shot at the world title. They're relegated to the opening matches or being lost in the card (or series of matches on a given show) somewhere in the middle. But here's Jeff, fighting for his life, in a dangerous match up with one of the most famous wrestlers, even at the time.

And I'm so enthralled by this match that I still remember it this well, almost 24 years later. I had to look up some parts to remember specific imagery, but I still have the general feeling of being in awe. Realizing that my own physical limitations didn't have to put me down, that I could struggle against what was put in front of me. And yeah, I may not always win, but I still might gain the respect of my peers in the process or in the very least take solace that I gave it my all and left nothing on the table. That's what this match was about, that's what so much of wrestling is about for me. It's putting everything you have and love not just to entertain but also to give people motivation that they can do anything they put their minds to.

Of course, that's not entirely true.

But come on, I was 10 years old!

Professional wrestling matters and all of the things I've said matters because it can inspire us like any other piece of media. It can enthrall us, disgust us, fascinate us, and sometimes it can do all of those things at once! The most horrible of heels (bad guys), the most inspiring faces, the dastardly villains and the dashing heroes as well as everyone else that doesn't fit neatly within those two categories. We're just doing Greek theater all over again, and replacing the gods and figures of history with superheroes, except those superheroes are being thrown on the mat for our entertainment, like a much more civilized and ethical version of the coliseum.

And that wasn't even the best part.

Because after the match, when Jeff has already taken a chokeslam off of the ladder (so at least 10 ft up on to the mat) Hardy tries to get back up. But then Hardy takes a "last ride" (Undertaker's finishing move, basically a very forceful and high up powerbomb)...and then he struggles to get back up. He gets on the mic, calls Undertaker out and tells him he's still standing. Undertaker shakes his head in disbelief, not knowing quite what to do, considers hitting him.

But then he raises his hand and shows him respect.

This was arguably more important than the entire match. And it's why the story-telling of wrestling ​is told both inside and outside the ring. Personally I prefer more inside than outside, but regardless this was a beautiful example of how to further people's character after a match has already concluded.

And in that beauty, is what I see of professional wrestling. The business itself may not always be pretty, but I respect what these athletes put themselves through for our entertainment and you should too. You don't have to like it, but I hope this essay has helped inspire you to at least give watching it a shot.

Match recommendations:

And if you do, here's some help!

Kurt Angle vs Rey Mysterio - SummerSlam 2002: One of the coolest short matches of all time. They got told they had 10 minutes to kill it and said "bet".

Rey Mysterio vs Eddie Guerrero - Halloween Havoc 1997: One of the best cruiserweight matches of all time, featuring two of my favorite wrestlers.

Sasha Banks (now Mercedes Mone) vs Bayley - NXT TakeOver Brooklyn - I wanted to choose a fantastic match for the women as well, here's one from the golden days of NXT where the women's division was finally starting to heat up.

Kenny Omega vs "Hangman" Adam Page - AEW Full Gear 2020: One of the best conclusions of a wrestling story I've seen. You may not get as much out of this without knowing Hangman's journey to the title but the match is still amazing.

Samoa Joe vs Kenta Kobashi - Ring of Honor, 2005 - One of the most insane crowd reactions for a match I've ever seen. Watch this 20+ minute match if you want to see how much wrestling can mean to even a small indie crowd.

Kenny Omega vs Bryan Danielson - AEW Grand Slam 2021: This match is arguably two of the greatest wrestlers of all time facing off in a major promotion for the first (and currently last) time. It's a beautiful match in every way.

The Young Bucks vs Kenny Omega and Hangman Adam Page - AEW Revolution 2020: This is pure tag-team goodness and essential for anyone who wants to understand how good a tag team match can be.

"Timeless" Toni Storm vs Mariah May - AEW All In London 2024: One of the best women's matches of all time and an incredibly bloody match. There's many great women's matches in recent years, but this is probably the best.

Hangman Adam Page vs Swerve Strickland - Texas Death Match @ AEW Full Gear 2023: Speaking of bloody, this match is one of the most brutal matches of all time. If you enjoy violence in your rivalries, this match is a can't miss. Not for the faint of heart, and not for the squeamish either.

Will Ospreay vs Bryan Danielson - AEW Dynasty 2024: Another showcase of two of the greatest talents in modern professional wrestling. Possibly one of the greatest matches I've ever seen in my life.

Conclusion

Also, for all of the talking about WWE here (mostly because I know that's what people know about wrestling), I massively favor watching indies like Deadlock Pro Wrestling (sadly now defunct) and the #2 promotion in America, All Elite Wrestling, which focuses more on the wrestling than the entertainment part.

Anyways, if you want to watch some good wrestling, go support your local indie or, if you like what you saw from the AEW matches, go check them out! They're not currently in the middle of a trafficking lawsuit or take blood money from Saudi Arabia, so as far as billionaire owned wrestling companies go they're OK!

In conclusion: Wrestling is more real than your favorite show and likely more real than we all are to each other on a daily basis. I choose to embrace that fact with happiness and excitement but your mileage may vary.